A report this week stated that sex is good for you three times a week; no more. Sorry ladies, perhaps if you would like to enter the monthly prize draw? I did wonder whether one’s allocation would have to be used on a scheduled weekly basis or could be stockpiled until the end of the month/financial quarter. The latter could of course be extremely dangerous (just ask Lamar Odom of Kardashian infamy), but what a way to go. It reminded me of the ever present three word theme that is used in advertising, the ubiquitous posters imploring you to change your life in some way; the nursery rhyme that features visually impaired rodents and the chatlines for “Blonde Swedish Housewives”, (other nationalities are available and anyway, they all live in Croydon and the closest that they have ever got to Stockholm is the local Ikea).
At Cheshire and Co we are always looking to market properties in innovative ways, so I am considering a new approach to listing houses. For example, if we want to sell any house in Llanyravon and Croesyceiliog, all we have to say, is, “off road parking” and it will be gone before Rightmove can produce a weekly report on its data. Similarly, “flat rear garden” for a property in Henllys and Ty Canol will result in “too late jockey” for anyone who thinks that they will wait until the weekend to book a viewing. There is of course much opportunity for artistic interpretation, not least the quintessential, “requires some upgrading” that can mean anything from replacing the perfectly serviceable but a little tired 1970’s kitchen, to the more realistic, “it’s falling down”. As I write this poolside in Marbs, whilst the current Mrs Chesh puts some hard training into the athletic discipline of “serious sun bathing”, I am making a pledge on my return that when writing up new property details, I will make a conscious effort to wean myself off my old favourite, “further benefits from”; a classic of its time, rather like my vinyl Slade collection and sheepskin coat.
Just in case you think that my time in the foothills of the Sierra Blanca is spent doing nothing but admiring the view (human and geographical), may I enlighten you to a piece of trivia. The number 3 is the largest number still written with as many lines as the number represents, i.e. III. The Ancient Romans did write the number 4 as IIII, until it was replaced by the subtractive notation IV in the Middle Ages. Bet you didn’t expect to read that in a property blog.